whatsthehurry | (no subject)

(no subject)

[ it's late, and kaeya is drunk.

not drunk enough to stumble and slur, nor to not know where he is, or whom he is with, but drunk enough to make reckless choices. drunk enough to touch what he shouldn't, and say forbidden things. drunk enough to eye diluc with undisguised hunger, across the bar. what they have between them.. it's nothing new. kaeya's felt this way for a long, long time - since they were boys, if he's honest with himself, and tonight, he is. it isn't the first time he's been tipsy in the angel's share and sent diluc heated looks, and he's sure it won't be the last, but kaeya nevertheless doesn't intend to grab diluc's wrist when he reaches for kaeya's glass. he's never been quite so bold before.

but it's raining tonight, and the rain makes him melancholy and nostalgic. rain reminds him of the things he's lost. it was storming, the night his father left him at the winery, when first he met master crepus, and diluc. it was storming again, the day he lost them both. thunder rolls in the distance, and wind rattles the windows in their frames; the storm is likely the only reason that diluc hasn't made good on his threats to kick kaeya out, despite the fact that the angel's share closed over an hour ago. kaeya is repaying that kindness, it seems, with assertiveness, his hand closing more tightly around diluc's wrist. even through his glove, he can feel the heat of diluc's skin.. he's always run so warm. ]

Luc -

[ the nickname comes too easily; kaeya's tongue is too loose. he clears his throat and grins genially, though his thumb is gliding beneath the hem of diluc's glove, sliding against bare skin. ]

That is, Master Diluc.. just one more, please. If you would be so kind.

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[ Just when he thinks he's grown used to this, to the new status quo - or at least, just when he's told himself enough that things won't change that he begins to believe it - Kaeya has to go and do something like this, to upend everything on its head once again.

At this late hour, Kaeya has been the only patron left in the bar for a long time; everyone has gone home, the rest of the staff, the bards, even the stragglers that wait until Diluc levels them with a glare to head on out. Such circumstances weren't uncommon; Kaeya often stayed late at the Angel's Share, whether or not Diluc is tending the bar that night, and with the weather the way that it is, Diluc keeps hoping it will lighten up enough for Kaeya to go home without him feeling too guilty about it.

For better or for worse, he knows all the other man wants is company. Tonight he yet again begrudgingly accepts the fact that he is the target of that focus, much as he might wish otherwise. Wouldn't it be so much easier if Kaeya would hang around The Cat's Tail? Or any other tavern in Mondstadt? There's certainly no shortage of them for him to choose from, and many with owners that will treat him with a warmer reception than Diluc will. If Kaeya hadn't shown his face here tonight, Diluc could have had a nice, quiet, average evening, tending to his work.

Yet merely the idea of Kaeya going somewhere else makes his chest tighten in a way he thought he left behind long ago, broken on the night Kaeya confessed the truth to him and unmade the world that was already crumbling at his feet. His heart won't let him off the hook for feelings left lingering, an unconfessed truth. They had both kept secrets from one another, but now, Diluc's seems so...childish. That they still cling to him when so much time has passed, when it's been so long since he and Kaeya were brothers, is nothing but empty foolishness.

And now Kaeya does this. Grasping his wrist, grazing his skin, teasing him in a manner that he cannot possibly know the depths of. He's just a shameless flirt, as he's always been, and very drunk, making him even more tactile than usual. It doesn't mean anything. It shouldn't mean anything.

Diluc doesn't want it to mean anything.

He clears his throat. ]

No, I think I'd rather be cruel. I'm cutting you off before I have to carry you home myself. I can't promise I wouldn't get tired halfway through and abandon you in the street.

[ He wouldn't, of course. The barest moment of hesitation, and then he is snatching his wrist away, skin burning where Kaeya had touched him. Damn him. ]

[ diluc snatches his hand away, and kaeya misses his warmth immediately, like a little barb to the heart. there was once a time when they were so close that such a touch would be commonplace for them, there was once a time when they would share beds and lean on one another in the grass, and as they grew, kaeya only became more and more handsy. he'd been aloof as a child, wary and uncertain, but diluc coaxed him open like the sun turns the head of a flower, and kaeya had learned to touch.

now, it's all he knows. the only thing that keeps him sane. touching others, that connection, even if it's fleeting.. he needs it to feel like he's worth something, to remind himself that someone wants to be near him, if even only for one night. always only for one night. well, almost always.

nevertheless, his hand feels too empty, now. cold in the wake of diluc's heat. ]

One more will hardly make a difference!

[ he complains, and he's not entirely wrong. kaeya's tolerance is quite strong, one drink alone won't tip him over to tripping over his own two feet, but he already knows that his argument will fall onto deaf ears. diluc is an intensely stubborn man, and once he's made a decision he rarely budges on it, not even for kaeya. especially not for kaeya. ]

You're so cruel to me..

[ a heavy sigh, and kaeya leans his chin onto one hand, his eye flitting to follow diluc as he moves. thunder rumbles again in the distance, and kaeya muses to himself, studying the line of diluc's beautiful profile. he looks good, dressed like this. he looks good dressed in anything. ]

Allow me to help you clean up, at least, after keeping you late on my account.

[ he's already sliding out of his seat. ]

[ One more will hardly make a difference, yes, but then one becomes two, and then three, and so on. Kaeya is still present enough to keep his balance, but a few more drinks would rob him of that sense, and that is right at the top of Diluc's list of things to not deal with tonight. Just being here alone with Kaeya is...complicated enough. A reminder, yet again, of things undone, unspoken, unrealized.

He huffs yet another sigh, more belabored this time, though he does not protest Kaeya's offer. If that means he'll stop pestering him for drinks, so be it. ]

If you insist. Just don't break anything.

[ In the meantime, Diluc will continue to clean the glasses behind the bar, polishing away fingerprints, while watching Kaeya closely when he thinks the other man isn't looking. To make sure he isn't unsteady on his feet, in case he does need a hand after all. It gives him an excuse to watch him.

His wrist still tingles. From that simple, meaningless touch. Despite everything, he still hungers for that physical affection that once came so easily. Some things never change, never fade. ]

[ kaeya is, perhaps, a little unsteadier than he otherwise might be were he entirely sober, but considering he's been drinking for hours, he's actually doing quite well for himself. and he plans to make good on his offer.

so while diluc tends to the glasses, kaeya meanders around the tavern proper, pushing chairs back in, gathering up abandoned glasses that diluc hasn't yet gotten to, and depositing them in the sink. it's quiet, and.. it's nice. it's just a silly thing, the two of them tending to the angel's share, it's nothing exciting, or groundbreaking, but just.. existing in the same space as diluc, peacefully - it's warm and nostalgic. kaeya could visit any tavern in mondstadt (and on occasion, he does), but this is where his heart lingers, where he comes after difficult, long days, in the hopes that diluc will be behind the bar.

of course, kaeya has to ruin everything. he can't just let this idyllic moment be.

before he can set to washing the glasses, he'll need to get himself a cloth, but they're tucked into a drawer that diluc so happens to be standing in front of. rather than ask him to scoot, like any normal person might, kaeya instead steps up behind him and reaches around him - one arm forward, to snag a dishrag, while the other settles on diluc's hip. kaeya's chin hooks over his shoulder, and he grins like a jackal, his breath gusting against diluc's ear and throat. ]

Sorry, sorry. I'll be out of your way in a moment.

[ but he isn't leaving. ]

[ For those brief few moments, it is warm and nostalgic, and it hits Diluc hard in a crashing wave that he isn't expecting, as it always does when he recognizes just how much he misses Kaeya's constant camaraderie and companionship. Not for the first time, he has to ask himself what he stalls for, why he pushes Kaeya away when it would be so very easy to let him close again. Maybe the reason is because it would be so easy. To return to such halcyon days is nothing but a daydream, unreachable in the reality of things that cannot be undone and unsaid.

The moment comes crashing down quickly enough, when Kaeya all but envelops him, surrounding Diluc with the familiar scent of his hair and skin, colored by wine, but no less beautiful and aching in its familiarity.

In an instant, Diluc's heart leaps into his throat, a fussy heat igniting beneath his collar that he wishes he could shove right back down in that corner of his heart that is fit to burst with unaddressed fondness. So, this is how drunk he is. Drunk enough to unknowingly toy with Diluc's heart even more than he does on a daily basis. It's like a kick to the gut, and he would be scowling, if it also didn't feel so nice.

Gods...what is he doing? What is he thinking?

Swallowing against his heart in his throat, Diluc turns his crimson gaze onto Kaeya's sharp grin, schooling the nerves out of his voice with a well-practiced huff. ]

You've had your moment. Or are you really already to the point where I'll need to carry you home?

[ That must be it, right? Kaeya is just drunk and foolish and there is nothing else that Diluc need to consider, let alone acknowledge. Even if it's not the first time - not the first time his touch has lingered like this, his presence persisting even when anyone else would step back and give him room. No, it's just one more thread in the tangled up web of their relationship that Diluc will lock away, refusing to address for as long as humanly possible.

It doesn't mean anything. It can't. ]

[ kaeya isn't sure what he's thinking, or if he's even thinking at all. if he were entirely sober, he'd be unlikely to pull such a stunt - not because he has any semblance of shame, but because he'd admittedly not be brave enough. diluc has kept their chilly distance for years, yet kaeya can't help but cling to him nonetheless, too afraid to lose what little connection they have left, too afraid to jeopardize it further by being too bold.

but the wine warms his blood and heart and libido, all, a dangerous combination when he and diluc are left alone in a bar at night, while the rain beats down upon the windows. kaeya makes poor decisions when it rains. ]

Maybe I am.

[ he chuckles, low and soft, tipping his head until his nose and mouth are pressed to diluc's collar, where fabric gives way to impossibly warm, soft skin, the touch of it to his lips enough to lance a shiver down his spine. kaeya's hand on diluc's hip tightens. ]

Would you carry me, Master Diluc?

[ kaeya's voice curls, teasing, as he presses to diluc's back, his free hand dropping the dishrag to instead glide over diluc's abdomen, his breath rushing. diluc smells so good, so painfully familiar, the scent of him alone catapulting kaeya into warm, bittersweet memories. so many days spent lying on the grass together in the vineyards, running along the beach together, or lazing around the winery, kaeya draped over his sworn brother's shoulders as he read.

gods, what does he think he's going to achieve, with this? ]

[ For a moment, he is just about to push him away, to force the distance when Kaeya refuses to give it willingly. Perhaps he's too drunk to realize just how close he is, and how close he continues to be. It would be better for the both of them if Diluc pushes him away. Like he always does. Pushing and pushing, to protect the fragile barrier put up around his heart. He always makes it look so much easier than it is, but moments like this kill him.

That's why he doesn't push him away when he should, because that touch is so sweet and tender and achingly familiar, that those wistful memories seep deep between the cracks in his heart and touch him where he is raw. And it's because he doesn't push Kaeya away the a soft, plaintive sound escapes his throat when the other's lips brush his neck. A sound he quality swallows down and away, and Kaeya will no doubt feel the urgency with which he does so, with how closely pressed he is to him. ]

Kaeya.

[ Diluc murmurs, his tone inscrutable, unclear if he utters his name as a warning or an invitation. He himself doesn't even know, though he should. Maybe he's just tired.

He's so godsdamned tired.

There's still a moment, for him to force Kaeya away, that he doesn't take, though neither does he advance things any further than this, much as he aches to turn his head and fulfill that daydream that has lingered so long in the back of his mind. First as an idyllic fantasy, and then as a reminder of what he could never have. His throat constricts tight with emotion, Kaeya's cool touch counteracting his burning frustration, holding him back from an outright outburst. ]

You're drunk.

[ He shouldn't be doing this. They shouldn't be doing this. Whatever it even is. Misplaced longing for a lifetime lost to them? These lingering touches are nothing new, Kaeya has always been a tactile flirt, even with Diluc, but now, like this - there's something more to them. Something Diluc doesn't want to face, but has always known was there.

He bites his bottom lip. ]

You're not thinking straight.

[ That has to be it. That has to be it. ]

[ gods, diluc is beautiful. everything about him. not just the way he looks - though of course, to kaeya's eyes there is no man more lovely - but the way he sounds, the way he smells, the way he moves. diluc is elegance given form, the lines of his strong body alluring, the scent of his skin the most attractive thing that kaeya has ever experienced. he's loved diluc for so damned long that it feels like exquisite agony. ]

Maybe I'm not.

[ he admits, his voice humming against diluc's skin. ]

Maybe I am.

[ the wine has lowered his inhibitions, that much is true, but it hasn't conjured feelings that weren't already there, festering in his heart for years, and years, and years. this isn't the first time he's come onto diluc, admittedly - it's happened a few times, when kaeya's been drunk and the hour's been late, but diluc has always rebuffed him, just as he's rebuffing him now.

but he also isn't pulling away. which isn't an invitation to continue, but kaeya moves forward nonetheless; now that he's holding diluc so close, he can't possibly let him go. the hand at diluc's hip slides upward, his thumb just barely slipping beneath the hem of diluc's shirt and vest to glide against yielding skin. how is he so perfect? everything about him. every inch of him. ]

I'm not that drunk, Master Diluc.

[ drunk enough to push where he shouldn't, sober enough to know exactly what he's doing. kaeya pushes people even when he doesn't have a belly full of wine, and he pushes diluc especially, always picking away at him, pushing his buttons, trying desperately to get a rise out of him because he yearns for diluc's attentions. kaeya presses harder to his back, pinning diluc against the bar, his hand on diluc's abdomen sliding downward, his mouth at diluc's throat roving, dragging up toward his ear, over all that pale, perfect skin. ]

I know you want this.

[ since they were young, it's always been there. this pull between them. this aching need that they were too afraid to act on in their youth. ]

[ If Kaeya is trying to win his attention, he certainly has it now, fully and undivided.

How can he think about anything else, when Kaeya pins him to the bar like that, muscles and limbs pressed flush against him, and the hint of a bulge between Keaya's legs that makes Diluc's heart pound so hard he's sure Kaeya must be able to hear it. Unbidden, a shudder rolls down his spine as Kaeya mouths at his skin, and he must reach forward to grip the countertop with one white-knuckled hand, to keep himself from either turning to slap him, or shoving his tongue so far down his throat that he can taste that soft purr in Kaeya's voice --

Heat flushes over him, a mix of doubt and embarrassment and fear, but also real, visceral desire. Even when he had first returned to Mondstadt, and he and Kaeya had reformed an oh-so-tentative connection, it had lingered. The attraction that had burned through him in their youth, the fondness that captivated him anytime Kaeya spoke. Would that Diluc would scrub it away, blot it out so that it might disappear forever, but when love is written so indelibly upon the soul, what hope is there to excise it?

Is that even what he wants? It might be what is easier, but is it what he wants?

He so rarely considers what he wants these days. Would it really so bad if...but yes, of course it would, that's why he's never pursued this, when Kaeya has made his interest and intentions clear. Once they take that step, there is no going back, and things are already complicated enough. Acknowledging the shape of his heart wouldn't make that any better.

He only realizes then that his free hand has lifted to Kaeya's cheek, thumb gliding along his striking jawbone, the warmth of his skin just piercing through Diluc's gloves. He hasn't pushed Kaeya away, and now he is keeping him here, encouraging him, his stomach twisting into knots of anxious excitement. ]

That - doesn't matter. We...I can't...

[ What will become of them, if Diluc's resolve wavers now, if he lets Kaeya into that space that he's ached for him to occupy for so very long? ]

[ diluc's hand rises to his face, and kaeya's heartbeat quickens, his exhale rushing in a soft shudder. it's such a small thing, the brush of diluc's gloved fingers, but to kaeya, who is starved for his affections, it feels like slaking his thirst after traversing a desert. he can smell the leather of diluc's gloves. heat is gathering under kaeya's skin, and tingling anticipation -

and then diluc says those words. i can't.

kaeya is a pushy man, but a no is a no; it doesn't matter that diluc's body is responding, that his voice sounds beautifully breathless, it doesn't even matter that diluc is touching his jawline like a lover. he keeps pressing kaeya back, and he must take no for an answer. kaeya grunts his displeasure. ]

.. right.

[ he should stop. kaeya is sure that diluc wants this, that he's wanted it as long as kaeya has, but.. so much has changed between them, and there can be no ignoring the yawning chasm between them, black and empty and painfully wide. kaeya pushes forward, and diluc pushes away. they've come to this impasse many times, more times than kaeya wants to admit, and it always ends the same - with diluc arching against him, wanting and longing, and saying no.

kaeya was a fool to think this time would be any different from all the rest. maybe diluc is right. no, of course diluc is right. he always is. this is a fool's errand. nothing will bring back those warm, idyllic days, nothing will make things as they were, no matter how either of them try. kaeya closes his eye, pressing his face to the nape of diluc's neck, breathing in the irresistible scent of his hair and skin.. before he draws away, and snags the dishrag again. ]

I'll finish up those dishes.

[ Just as quickly as the heat overcame him, he is bereft, as Kaeya steps away.

Of course, part of him wants Kaeya to ignore his protest, to keep pushing him to the point where Diluc can no longer refuse, so he doesn't need to make a choice. But Kaeya would never do that, no matter how clear their mutual desire might be. There are lines that have been drawn, impossible to cross, for the fallout would be...messy, to say the least. Diluc doesn't want to face it. Or maybe it's better to say that he's afraid to.

He can never forgive, he can never forget. They can never go back.

Yet when Kaeya steps away, he leaves Diluc with such an aching sense of longing, the memory of his lips against his skin and his nose in his hair still fresh, and his arms wrapped tight around his body, holding to him like a lover. He can't do this anymore. Can't keep sundering not only his own heart, but Kaeya's, too. No matter how his betrayal still stings, no matter how it made Diluc question everything he knew and remake his view of the world into something far less innocent, neither of them deserve to endure this. With every passing day, Diluc hopes it will ease, but it doesn't. He misses Kaeya more than he ever has in his life in that moment, and he's still within arm's reach.

Why is he doing this? What is it all for?

His heart races like it might split right in two, and before he can think better of it, before he can think at all, he surges forward, reaching for Kaeya's face and taking his jaw between his hands, pulling him in for a ferocious, hungry, desperate kiss, his lips already parted, wanting, seeking anything and everything that Kaeya is willing to give him. Like a dam that has burst forth, he untethers everything that he's been holding back. Every ache and pain and fearsome desire of his lonesome heart.

Sometimes a wound grows to fester far too much for one to bear, and it must be lanced to purge and cleanse. This is what Diluc needs right now; to lance the wound, to let it all spill forth. To kiss Kaeya with full, unabated need, inhaling deep against his lips as if Diluc needs the very air from his lungs to breathe. ]

[ it clings to him - the scent of diluc's hair, the taste of his skin, the memory of his heat, his solid body pressed close. he's so near, he's right in front of him, yet somehow they feel miles apart. it always feels this way, when diluc turns him down, it's like a part of his heart is withering.

he'll get over it. he always does. and in a week, or a month, or half a year, they'll dance this dance again.

and then diluc rushes him.

kaeya is taken aback so suddenly and unexpectedly that he stumbles into the wall behind him, his back colliding with it in a dull thud. there's a brief moment of shock, of confusion, before his instincts take hold and he's pressing back, breathing a low, needful groan against diluc's mouth, both arms coiling around him, squeezing tightly.

he feels and tastes every bit as good as kaeya had imagined, and he's imagined it many, many times before, more times than he could rightly remember. kaeya's breath rushes, his heart leaping into his throat as his lips part beneath diluc's onslaught - there's no more hesitation. kaeya's tongue dips forward, past diluc's lips and into his mouth. he tastes impossibly sweet, dark and tangy and perfect, and kaeya laps him up like a man starved. he's wanted this for so long. too long.

thunder rolls, and kaeya arches his back away from the wall, pressing tightly to diluc's body, the kiss alone enough to send heat spiraling south, lancing straight to his groin. in an instant he's hard in his pants, his hips snapping forward, his hands seizing tightly in the fabric of diluc's vest, white-knuckled. all he can hear is the sinful, wet noises of their mouths together, and the gusts of their quick, staggered breathing. kaeya feels dizzy, and it isn't from the wine. ]

[ Kaeya isn't the only one who has imagined it many times before.

In his younger days, when they were young and carefree, Diluc would imagine it while they sat beneath the big sunsettia tree on the hill, Kaeya's head in his lap as they laughed and shared stories, his heart buoyed up with warmth and fondness that was exhilarating and new. Not long after he left Mondstadt, he would still imagine it, what it could have been like if Kaeya were not who he turned out to be, if their entire lives hadn't been seeded with lies; Diluc would imagine it after long, arduous missions, while he touched himself, the only way to burn off the adrenaline and regret. He would imagine it when he at last returned, and they settled into this bewildering, unspoken pattern, when Kaeya would stay late, when his touch would linger, when his voice warmed with affection. He has imagined those lips on his a thousand times, and even still, he is wholly unprepared for how good it is, how sweet, how burning, scorching hot. In an instant, in envelops him fully, burning away all else until it is the only thing left.

A sound like a snarl meets the slick slide of Kaeya's tongue in his mouth, nearly primal in his need, experiencing so much all at once for the first time. It's a reminder of just how...new to this he is, and so it's a good thing that instinct can take him a long way. He chases what feels good, and what feels right, and right now, Kaeya's warm, wet mouth surges against his own, and Diluc answers him readily, sinking his teeth into Kaeya's bottom lip, exhaling sharply when his hips press to his own. ]

Kae...

[ He breathes, wistful, leaning fully into the other's body, one hand sinking into his dark hair, the other pawing at the buttons of his vest. New to this or not, Diluc is not shy once he has decided to go for something, and inexperience won't stop him from seeking the warmth of Kaeya's skin. Not when he's ached for it for so long.

Still, he doesn't even get all the buttons all the way undone before he is gliding his fingers beneath the hem of Kaeya's shirt, seeking the warmth of his skin. Never before has he cursed himself so strongly for making a habit of wearing gloves. ]

[ it feels so right. nothing in kaeya's life has ever felt so completely.. correct.

diluc's mouth slots to his perfectly, kissing him feels natural and easy, and it breeds in him a hunger for more, for everything diluc is willing to give. he tastes like an absolute dream. and then he's breathing that sweet little nickname, and kaeya's heart tightens in his chest, as if squeezed by an invisible fist.

perhaps something of them is salvageable. he has to believe that, he has to cling so tightly to the threads that remain between them, because kaeya cannot imagine a life without diluc in it. good or bad, diluc's attention is all he craves. ]

Luc -

[ he whispers harshly, exhaling a low hum when diluc's teeth find his lower lip. this sort of rushed, violent desire is just what they need, what feels perfect for them. diluc's hands work at his front, and kaeya has to regrettably lift his hands from diluc's body for a moment to work open the front of his furred bolero, shrugging it off of his shoulders. it falls heavily to the floor, landing in a heap, forgotten. then his hands are on diluc again, unable to get enough of him, and as he presses them beneath the back of diluc's shirt and vest, kaeya is glad that his gloves are fingerless, for he's able to feel his lover's scorching hot skin, stretched tight with scars and nicks. ]

I want you.

[ The rush of emotion that crashes over him in waves drowns out any rational thought in his head, otherwise he would surely be stepping back, muttering a rushed apology, insisting again that they can't do this. But that voice in his mind is well and truly silenced by the voracious way Kaeya kisses him, like a starving man slaking his hunger, like Diluc's attention is the only thing in the world that he needs. Perhaps that is true. He has ever made his regret apparent to Diluc, as reluctant as Diluc may have been to accept it.

And had things gone differently that night, if Kaeya had told him long before what he was, maybe they would be old lovers by now, deep into the summer of their romance, kissing just like this, but without any of the accompanying aches. For as good as it is, there is also frustration, fear, and regret. Every single emotion that is tied to Kaeya in his heart, right at the tender center that he still and ever will occupy.

The sound of Kaeya's bolero hitting the floor makes Diluc's heart slam hard against his ribcage, and as Kaeya's hungry fingers reach for his skin, he pulls back his own hands to tug off his gloves and toss them aside. How long has he wanted to touch this skin? To explore it freely, with needful palms? No sooner are his gloves tossed aside than do Diluc's hands glide over Kaeya's slender, handsome shoulders, grasping tight, fingers flexing against his skin. He feels so good...for all the build up they've had over years and years, Diluc is already terribly hard against the front of his trousers, but in this moment, he can't bring himself to be embarrassed by the fact.

His kiss breaks away for the barest of moments so he can utter: ]

Take it off.

[ His fingers snap around the snug crease of Kaeya's corset. He ain't dealing with this complicated outfit, take it off Kaeya!!! ]

[ but the corset is so hot!! :c can't they just bang in it!!

there's an authority to diluc's words that kaeya finds incredibly sexy, enough to make his blood rush hot, and he doesn't hesitate even a moment before he's working open the snaps of his cincher, one by one. his hands are deft even while half-drunk, and he's removed this thing enough times to not struggle with it - it drops away, and kaeya exhales hard against diluc's mouth.

being touched by him.. it's everything kaeya had dreamt it would be, and more. the amount of times he's thought about this is truly staggering. hardly a night goes by where he's not thinking of diluc as he falls asleep, or as he jerks off, or, he's ashamed to admit, as he's fucking someone else into their mattress. diluc's hands are hot as hellfire.

they're rushing, needy, forceful, their kiss still hungry and bottomless. kaeya can't keep his mouth away, he's drunk on the flavor of diluc's mouth, on the slippery slide of his tongue, and the way his breath feels, gusting hot against kaeya's lips. he rocks his hips forward again, and the feel of diluc's erection grinding hot against his own is enough to elicit a low groan from him that sounds almost pained; the sheer need he has for diluc is blissful agony. ]

Fuck -

[ he whispers, yanking his the hem of his white shirt out of his trousers, so he can snag diluc's wrists and push his hands up beneath it, eager for that skin to skin contact. ]

[ They are rushing, but Diluc can't bring himself to care, or even bring himself to think. If he does, this all might come crashing down, but it feels too good for him to even entertain the idea. They have played at this for so long, it's almost like they've hade years of foreplay, and now that they're no longer holding themselves back, every shored-up need and desire is spilling forth with wild abandon.

Kaeya curses against his tongue, and Diluc curls his own against his lover's, tasting him, sucking his tongue and his lips and swallowing down their flavor. It's like he's known them forever, even if they have never kissed before. Kaeya still tastes exactly like he should, and exactly as good as he should.

With Kaeya's helpful push, Diluc's hands rove over his chest, seeking warm skin greedily, sinking his fingers over every ridge and dip and scar that they pass. They push up against his chest, raking over his beautiful pecs that Diluc has admired so many times from Kaeya's generous neckline, and his thumbs drag against Kaeya's nipples, a groan exhaled sharply, before he is grinding his hips to Kaeya's again, hungrily seeking that friction again, the feeling of Kaeya's warm cock against his own. There is far too much fabric between them. ]

You feel...incredible...

[ His words are little more than a moan, and reluctant though he is to drop his hands away from Kaeya's chest, he must so he can work open the front of his belt, hastily tugging his trousers open just enough that he can plunge his hand down the front and curl his touch against Kaeya's burning cock.

He feels more than incredible, really. He feels better than Diluc could have ever dreamed, and gods, has he dreamed. The weight of that silky cock against his palm burns away all else, his mouth all but trembling against Kaeya's. ]

[ diluc's hands range over his chest, and kaeya arches into his touch, pressing into those burning hot palms, eager and wanting while they kiss, and kaeya is sure that this is the best kiss he's ever experienced in his life. diluc might not have experience, but he has instinct, and he's following it perfectly - to the surprise of no one. diluc has always known how to follow his body, it's why he's such a strong, incredible fighter; he knows when to stop thinking and allow muscle and sinew to rule the mind.

then again, kaeya is also incredibly biased. he'd steal the sun from the sky for diluc if only he asked, and he's spent so long imagining what kissing him would be like, that feeling it is like.. a dream. it's heady and intoxicating, and in the back of his mind kaeya wonders if perhaps this is a dream, borne of drunken slumber, and he'll soon wake alone in his bed, slick with sweat, his pants wet with come.

kaeya only has a few moments to consider what's happening when diluc is tugging at his belt; before he knows it, diluc's hand is pressing down into his trousers, grasping his cock with greed and confidence. there's a white-hot flash behind his eyes, and kaeya moans into diluc's mouth, his hips snapping forward. ]

Luc..

[ it's not often that kaeya feels overwhelmed between the sheets - or against the wall, as it were - but right now diluc has him on the ropes, and kaeya's knees feel weak from the sensation alone. he presses back into the wall with such force that it makes the glasses and tumblers chime.

diluc is absolutely outstripping him, here, washing kaeya away with his need, and it's all he can do to keep his head above water. but he won't be outdone. kaeya's fingers are a little clumsy and rushed, but he makes quick work of the buttons on diluc's shirt, popping them open as swiftly as he can manage until at last he's able to press his palms against bare, hot skin. over deep scars and straining tendons. ]

[ It's only so he doesn't lose himself in being overwhelmed that Diluc must continue to push and press forward, because if he slowed down for even a moment, every wave that crashes against his momentum would surely stagger him. He's wanted this for so long, they both have, that it would be impossible to touch and kiss without the threat of losing themselves to it. If he must be the one to keep pressing on, then so be it.

It does seem fitting in a way, too. He has made Kaeya wait so very long for this, and there are so many times he has teased him, so many times that they have come close to this exact point. Kaeya deserves to be taken care of, even if Diluc hardly knows what he's doing.

But so far, it's been easy. Of course it's easy. He's thought about doing these very things so many times, practicing in his mind and in his dreams. He was ready.

So he continues with confidence as he pulls the length of Kaeya's cock out from his trousers, tugging them down around his hips just enough to do so comfortably. Without hesitation, he winds his fingers around Kaeya's length and pulls in quick, deep strokes, from root to tip and back again, feeling him fill out hard and full beneath his touch. He was already hard to begin with, but now the sensation almost makes Diluc dizzy, filled with thoughts of what it might be like to take him into his mouth, or into his body. Kaeya's experience in bed is well known in all of Mondstadt, and Diluc would like to experience the culmination of that knowledge.

His thumb rolls in circles over the tip of Kaeya's cock, slick already with precome, while he gasps against the feeling of Kaeya's roving hands, his palms scorching skin that already burns as hot as the sun. ]

Kae...don't stop.

[ Never stop. He would drown without this feeling, now that he's tasted it. Of that he's certain. ]

[ it's absolutely fitting indeed that they would come together this way, in a clash of fire and ice, just as they had four years ago on that awful, painful, rainy night. this is a different sort of conflict, but a conflict it remains, for how they push and pull at one another, vying for power, or really, vying to be the first to touch, the first to kiss, the first to drag teeth and nails against hot, perfect skin. it's feral, the way they're coming at one another, but kaeya couldn't imagine it any other way. it's diluc. they've been at odds for so long.

even if it wasn't always that way. even if kaeya has also thought about making slow, sweet love to him just as much as he's though about fucking him mindless. ]

I won't.

[ he whispers, his tongue dragging along diluc's soft lower lip, swollen from the ferocity of their kisses. his own lips burn sweetly, but he can't take his mouth away, can't stop kissing diluc even to press his mouth elsewhere, onto all of that soft skin. kaeya yearns to drag his mouth down diluc's body, to taste every inch of him until he's positively wrung out.

but then he would lose the sweet sensation of diluc's kiss, and the heady drunkenness that comes along with it. instead he allows his hands to move to diluc's back, still pressed under his shirt, his short fingernails dragging hot welts over pale skin - but it isn't enough. it isn't nearly enough. he's distracted, for a moment, by the drag of diluc's hand, how it pulls over his cock, strong and tight and confident, and when his thumb rolls over kaeya's tip he groans again, rocking his hips in a quick, staccato rhythm.

yet he wants more, too. kaeya's soon making quick work of diluc's trousers, unlacing them and shoving his hand down into that blinding heat until he's got his hand on diluc's cock. he's already so hard, silky smooth and fitting perfectly against kaeya's palm. ]

Fuck, you're perfect..

[ There will be a time and place for slow, sweet love-making, but this isn't it. It could be immediately after, it could be awhile away; Diluc couldn't say where things will take them once they aren't driven by absolute need, once there is space again in his head for things aside from the absolutely overpowering hunger he has for Kaeya. But of course, he doesn't preoccupy himself by worrying about that right now. Why would he? When he feels so good, when he feels so right, like scratching an itch that has lingered for years, or rubbing salve on a wound that has bled for far too long.

He's been a fool, to deny them this, but maybe it's better it happened this way.

Kaeya's cock in his palm already has him feeling heady and uneven, but Kaeya's slender fingers wrapping around his own cock makes him absolutely dizzy. Tilting his head back, Diluc groans, rolling his hips against Kaeya's searing touch, so eager to have those pretty little fingers reach over every inch of him. Then, his mouth is surging forward again, tongue lancing past Kaeya's lips; it turns out Kaeya isn't the only one who can't fathom the idea of not kissing the other.

With one hand still stroking around Kaeya's length, the other glides over Kaeya's ribs and to his back, pressing lower, skating along the ridge of his backside before nudging his trousers down even further with his knuckles. They drop down around Kaeya's knees now, and Diluc's fingers greedily sink into Kaeya's backside, dragging tight, red welts over his skin. ]

If I should stop...

[ Well. Kaeya will have to tell him, though his meaning remains unclear for a moment. He draws his hand back to the tip of Kaeya's cock, dragging his index finger up to the knuckle through his precome, and then his hand is reaching around Kaeya's thigh again, urging him to hook his leg over Diluc's side, so he can more easily drag his slick fingertip over the seam of his ass, teasing around his rim.

A primal groan rides Diluc's breath, as his hips surge forward, rolling against Kaeya's bare cock with his own, hot, silky skin brushing together, leaving him completely ravenous for more. He wants it all, everything that Kaeya has to give. He always has, he just...was too stubborn to let himself have it. ]

[ gods, they've waited too long. they've wanted this for years. diluc has pushed him away, but kaeya could still feel it, that longing, the electricity that surges between them like lightning, every time they're together. how many times has kaeya left him with lingering touches? how many times has he yearned to press his mouth to the delicate skin of diluc's throat, to learn how he tastes?

they'd come close a few times, in their youth, when they were foolish teenagers. kaeya can recall a time when they'd been lying in the grass, beneath a large tree just beyond the winery's boundary. his head was in diluc's lap, and kaeya was toying with all that red hair - how had they been so close, and yet so far? looking back, it was all too obvious that they were in love. kaeya still is. even now. even in this heated, fierce moment.

this moment in which they're pressing forward, toward an inevitable end that they've been building irresistibly toward. ]

Don't.

[ he hisses, even as diluc urges kaeya's thigh over his hip, anticipation squeezing tight in his gut. diluc's fingertip slides slick against his rim and kaeya's breath catches, his hand around diluc's cock squeezing, leather and skin both pulling hard. ]

Don't stop. Fuck me, Luc. I need you.

[ it's better this way, he thinks. kaeya doesn't know for sure, but he imagines that diluc doesn't have too much experience in this arena, and first times can be.. difficult. but kaeya knows what he's doing, knows how to receive just as well as he knows how to give. ]

[ Fuck me, Luc. I need you.

Diluc's features flush hot as hellfire at those words as they twist his stomach up into a thousand perfect, tiny knots, ready to burst. Like as not he could come right here against Kaeya's hand, it wouldn't take long at all, and he's practiced withholding while touching himself and thinking of encounters very much like this one. Unintentionally, he's prepared himself for this, even if his imagination pales to the real thing, the hunger, the need.

But Kaeya asks him to fuck him, and Diluc wouldn't dream of denying him this, of denying either of them this. Whatever happens after this encounter...he doesn't want to regret the act itself, when it has been building up for so long. It wouldn't do to lance the boil only to let it fill up with infection again, and regardless of the aftermath, they deserve this. They've waited so long, wanted so long, their attraction and tension undeniable. It's as close to fate as Diluc will let himself believe in.

Still, even if his course is set, he is...undeniably nervous. He's never done this before, what if he hurts him, in his haste? Diluc hardly prepared for this. He is hardly...ready, to press into Kaeya as they both need, but fortunately, he knows well of Kaeya's reputation of, uh, preparedness, and Diluc paws at the pockets of his low-slung trousers, still rocking his hips against Kaeya's exquisite touch, before withdrawing his quarry - a small glass vial. ]

Will you...?

[ He wants Kaeya to do it. Both to make sure the job is done right, and also...just so Kaeya can touch him more, though he hardly needs to. He's already hard as stone, hot and ready. This is the final step they need to take. ]

[ diluc's not the only one who's fit to burst. kaeya could come against diluc's palm in a heartbeat, without issue, right this fucking moment if diluc asked it of him, but they both want more than this. they need more than this. beneath the heat and need of the moment there's a cold tightness in his gut that worries for the future, that fears that this will be the one and only time that diluc will allow this, in which case he must desperately cling to this encounter, to set to memory every single moment of it, to take it and push it as far as diluc will allow.

which is as far as they want, it would seem.

kaeya knows what he's fishing for when diluc goes for his pockets, and kaeya's so glad that he had thought to keep a little vial of oil on him. he must always be prepared, and if he's honest.. any time he comes to the angel's share while diluc is working, he hopes it will come to this. it never does. it never has. but tonight, it's paying off. their eyes meet briefly, and kaeya takes the glass vial from diluc's hand without hesitation. ]

Mm..

[ he hardly needs to ask. he had to regrettably remove his hand from diluc's cock to remove his gloves with his teeth, one by one, but it's only a moment before he's slicked up his palm and gone back to work. slippery fingers glide along diluc's cock, coating him smoothly in oil from root to tip. ]

[ It's absolutely unfair, how good Kaeya makes it look when he pulls off his gloves with his teeth, how the mere implication of why he needs to do it at all has Diluc's stomach coiling tight, heat pressing hard into his cock, his gaze glued to the other man's teeth and lips. He looks so fucking good - he always does, but now, especially, with his pupils blown wide from need, his breathing heavy and swollen with groans, his lips red and puffed from their amorous exchanged. It's obscene, and Diluc can't get enough of it, even when Kaeya's fingers slick his cock, offering him a pretty good distraction. ]

Nh...that's perfect...

[ There's that temptation again, to come against his hand, to let himself go - it would still feel incredible. But he knows what he wants, he knows how he wants to do this. The way he's daydreamed about for so long, while touching himself in the dead quiet of the night. It's about to be his.

Growling low in his throat, Diluc takes Kaeya's face in his hands again and kisses him hard and deep, sucking his lower lip sharply in between his teeth, before his grasp drops down to Kaeya's hips again. One anchors behind the knee that is still hooked around his hip, while the reaches for his cock, surging forward so his tip glides against the hot underside of Kaeya's length. Diluc groands, but he presses on, arching his hips and forcing Kaeya further against the shelves behind them. It won't be very comfortable, but that's hardly a concern right now.

He has the angle he needs at last. With his teeth clenched, he guides the tip of his cock past Kaeya's waiting rim, careful and measured, before he smoothly rolls his hips to seat himself perfectly inside of Kaeya's body, yet another feral gasp escaping him. ]

Kae...

[ It's so overwhelming. He needs a moment, to keep his knees from buckling from sheer pleasure alone. ]