[ Just as quickly as the heat overcame him, he is bereft, as Kaeya steps away.
Of course, part of him wants Kaeya to ignore his protest, to keep pushing him to the point where Diluc can no longer refuse, so he doesn't need to make a choice. But Kaeya would never do that, no matter how clear their mutual desire might be. There are lines that have been drawn, impossible to cross, for the fallout would be...messy, to say the least. Diluc doesn't want to face it. Or maybe it's better to say that he's afraid to.
He can never forgive, he can never forget. They can never go back.
Yet when Kaeya steps away, he leaves Diluc with such an aching sense of longing, the memory of his lips against his skin and his nose in his hair still fresh, and his arms wrapped tight around his body, holding to him like a lover. He can't do this anymore. Can't keep sundering not only his own heart, but Kaeya's, too. No matter how his betrayal still stings, no matter how it made Diluc question everything he knew and remake his view of the world into something far less innocent, neither of them deserve to endure this. With every passing day, Diluc hopes it will ease, but it doesn't. He misses Kaeya more than he ever has in his life in that moment, and he's still within arm's reach.
Why is he doing this? What is it all for?
His heart races like it might split right in two, and before he can think better of it, before he can think at all, he surges forward, reaching for Kaeya's face and taking his jaw between his hands, pulling him in for a ferocious, hungry, desperate kiss, his lips already parted, wanting, seeking anything and everything that Kaeya is willing to give him. Like a dam that has burst forth, he untethers everything that he's been holding back. Every ache and pain and fearsome desire of his lonesome heart.
Sometimes a wound grows to fester far too much for one to bear, and it must be lanced to purge and cleanse. This is what Diluc needs right now; to lance the wound, to let it all spill forth. To kiss Kaeya with full, unabated need, inhaling deep against his lips as if Diluc needs the very air from his lungs to breathe. ]
no subject
Of course, part of him wants Kaeya to ignore his protest, to keep pushing him to the point where Diluc can no longer refuse, so he doesn't need to make a choice. But Kaeya would never do that, no matter how clear their mutual desire might be. There are lines that have been drawn, impossible to cross, for the fallout would be...messy, to say the least. Diluc doesn't want to face it. Or maybe it's better to say that he's afraid to.
He can never forgive, he can never forget. They can never go back.
Yet when Kaeya steps away, he leaves Diluc with such an aching sense of longing, the memory of his lips against his skin and his nose in his hair still fresh, and his arms wrapped tight around his body, holding to him like a lover. He can't do this anymore. Can't keep sundering not only his own heart, but Kaeya's, too. No matter how his betrayal still stings, no matter how it made Diluc question everything he knew and remake his view of the world into something far less innocent, neither of them deserve to endure this. With every passing day, Diluc hopes it will ease, but it doesn't. He misses Kaeya more than he ever has in his life in that moment, and he's still within arm's reach.
Why is he doing this? What is it all for?
His heart races like it might split right in two, and before he can think better of it, before he can think at all, he surges forward, reaching for Kaeya's face and taking his jaw between his hands, pulling him in for a ferocious, hungry, desperate kiss, his lips already parted, wanting, seeking anything and everything that Kaeya is willing to give him. Like a dam that has burst forth, he untethers everything that he's been holding back. Every ache and pain and fearsome desire of his lonesome heart.
Sometimes a wound grows to fester far too much for one to bear, and it must be lanced to purge and cleanse. This is what Diluc needs right now; to lance the wound, to let it all spill forth. To kiss Kaeya with full, unabated need, inhaling deep against his lips as if Diluc needs the very air from his lungs to breathe. ]